Monday, April 29, 2013

Way Of My Acceptance...

12:30 PM, I locked my computer by hitting two buttons simultaneously and stood up with empty stomach and heavy heart for lunch. Apparently, Life appeared of no use, useless discussions, hopeless talks, and aimless days. Eyes crawled for the death of last hope….it seemed as though nothing was left behind, only a barren land covered with stains of tears which could be spotted all around. And, when the strings of broken awful relations and love appeared before eyes then heart wished for the complete blindness. These thoughts ran hard down like a tempest and my feet ran inversely proportional to that storm. Without knowing, I escorted myself from building to the food court and directly went to one of the several queues without taking glance at any food menu. Bought a coupon and joined another queue for lunch. Mind had brought whole attention to deep broken feelings of life resided in my heart but somehow I managed to take that attention away and scatter it in the outside world. Now the eyes were looking at the all known faces around the food court, which seemed eccentric to me however, eyes did not rest at any particular face.

All beautiful faces out there were having all expressions.

Suddenly I caught a face that looked sad a moment before, was now blooming like a fresh rose and it was the feel of someone special for whom she had waited so desperately with two plates of fried rice. Now that someone special slowly sneaked a chocolate into her hand to bribe her for the acceptance of his delay in appearance but she refused mischievously and then accepted suddenly with a naughty smile and this made that someone special to feel more special in this world.

Few yards from there, a man in his middle age sat alone with a lunch box and looked at it with fondness as though it had been cooked and packed by someone special, must be his wife. Soon, people for whom he was waiting with open Lunchbox joined him and almost everyone carried a lunchbox in their hand.

At the far end, there were two tables. Both looked deserted but they were not. Those tables were occupied by one guy and one girl, respectively. Both sat alone and there was no one to share their loneliness of life and table both. Plates of food waiting at the table, spoons entangled somewhere between fingers and their faces had a look of dilemma which perhaps they did not even know. Only loneliness was keeping them company.

Somewhere in the middle of the food court, few tables were joined together and a group of comparatively young faces sat there enjoying Pizza, Chinese, etc. Few were couples and few were stags however all were friends. Sound of loud laugh and teasing coming along from there and made me recall similar days of mine. Freshness of smile on their faces and gentle roughness in their talk, forcing many ears to turned down in their direction.

Meanwhile I caught a bunch of people standing in front of a food menu board and trying to decide what to have in lunch today. Couples were among them and most could not reach a decision, there were conflicts in the eating habits. Few just agreed without much tussle and few simply agreed to their companion’s choice without further argument.

A housekeeping guy was mopping floor where someone had unwittingly poured curry and simultaneously few people walked through the same spot and seeing this housekeeping man lips started fluttering but no sound appeared and again started mopping the shoes sign left by them.

Eventually, I was ready with my plate of lunch and again looked around. The food court was full. While holding the plate with hands I looked for a place to sit and finally I got one table where a man in his early 50s was sitting alone and having his lunch in solace. I asked him, “Can I sit here?” He welcomed me with smile, “Yeah sure.”

Now I looked at the queue in which I was standing moments before and tried to look at it from the perspective wherein I was looking at everyone few moments before. This moment I realized that I was no different from the crowd I was part of it. My feelings, my emotions, my pain is no different from anyone in this world. There was no need to think this much about the pain I was suffering from. Everyone out there was having pain of some kind. Nothing was so big that I can’t endure. Everyone was coping with their goods and bads in their own way. Some by accepting, some by compromising, some by adjusting, some by talking to themselves, some by surrendering, and some by winning over. Therefore, why I cannot stop my fighting own with myself and look out for peace the way others doing, maybe I would get it.

Suddenly the middle age person sitting in front of me said, “You are right…All things in this world are same the only difference you can experience is the way you feel it or we can say, the way you want to feel it.” I replied with amazement, “What?”
He replied, “I am done with mine…are you?” and left the table without any further word, I saw him walking down food court and quickly disappeared in the crowd of common feelings.
Everything is common, no odds exist, and the only odd, which matters, is the way of your acceptance in this world.

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